Getting Better in 2022

I know many of you have given some thought to New Year’s resolutions for this year.  And, there are others who after so many failed attempts at reaching your goals, have already abandoned the idea of resolutions altogether.  No matter where you fall on the spectrum of setting New Year’s resolutions, we all strive to be better in 2022.  I know I do. 

I have always considered the new year as an opportunity to push the refresh button, a time to right wrongs, a time to be better, feel better and do better.  I am also getting older, wiser, and, interestingly, bolder than any other time in my life.

My goals and aspirations for the new year are BIG!  I have been asking myself , “How can I begin to live my best life ever?  What does happiness look like for me? How can I be a better person?  What do I want to do with the rest of my life? What changes do I want to make?”

These aspirations, like traditional resolutions, are so big it is difficult to determine the behavior changes needed to address them. 

I have discovered two techniques that I think will help me and, hopefully, you as we embrace each new year as a time to re-new, re-invest and re-invent who we are, realizing the best is yet to come.  

I. Microresolutions

Instead of setting traditional New Year’s resolutions – the grandiose, macro-resolutions where we proclaim to go from zero to 100 simply by making a proclamation – why not consider a micro-resolution.  As author Caroline L. Arnold suggests in her book, Small Move, Big Change:  Using Microresolutions to Transform Your Life Permanently, the most effective way to improve our lives is through pursuing small behavioral changes she refers to as micro-resolutions.

Most of us set ambitious resolutions that are long-term, often life-term goals that require significant time and effort, more than we can or are willing to give.  We soon realize that we won’t attain our goals, become overwhelmed, and quietly abandon them until it’s time to set resolutions again. 

Consider these common resolutions:

1. I want to spend more time with my family.

2. I want to read more.

3. I want to travel more.

4. I want to be a better person.

5. And, let’s be honest, we all start out the year planning to make healthier life choices – eat better, drink less wine, exercise more (and the list goes on).

Now, let’s turn them into micro-resolutions.

1. Resolution:  I want to spend more time with my family.

        Micro-resolution:  I will spend at least two hours every Saturday visiting my mom.

2. Resolution:  I want to read more.

        Micro-resolution:  I will read at least 15 minutes each day.

3. Resolution:  I want to travel more.

        Micro-resolution:  I will travel to three different cities this year.

4. Resolution:   I want to be a better person.

Micro-resolution:  I will pay it forward for at least two strangers once a month.

5. Resolution:  I want to make healthier choices.

        Micro-resolution:  I will eat fruit once each day.

These micro-resolutions are small, manageable and can be achieved immediately. Rather than trying to change too much too quickly, ask yourself, “What if I made one small change?” This strategy should bring you closer to your goals than past efforts.  Give it a try.

II. Questolutions

Now, let’s take those same resolutions and reframe them as questions.  Warren Berger, author of Beautiful Questions, advises that we reframe our resolutions into questolutions, suggesting we begin each question with, “How might I…?”

This seemingly small nuance can be powerful.   Instead of saying, “I want to spend more time with my family,” ask yourself, “How might I spend more time with my family?”   Instead of, “I want to read more, “ ask, “ How might I read more?”  We know from neuroscience the brain “lights up” in very specific ways in response to questions, as distinct from statements. When you turn your proclamation into a question, your brain immediately thinks about the actions you might take to accomplish your goals.

Whether you choose to use micro-resolutions, questolutions or a combination of both, I wish you the best in your quest to become a better you in 2022.

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